I feel like I’ve stood close to death and evil twice in my life: when a family member tried to commit suicide, and more recently- when a loved one was murdered.
One day, we were standing on the upper deck sipping boat drinks and inhaling the ocean breeze. My biological dad and I were choking back emotion as we talked about this second chance we were given to know one another.
My biological dad looked eerily similar to the way he looked in a dream I had as a child. He was tall with whispy strawberry blonde hair. His skin had a pink tint to it. He wore dark wash jeans that fit him well, with a light blue button down shirt and flip-flops.
It's not all glowing skin and pretty bump pictures. I realize I haven't taken the time to sit down and really hash some of this not-so-picture-perfect stuff out. You've been warned: Here goes the most whiny post I've probably ever written.
God has put you in this unique situation because, believe it or not, you can handle it. Without a doubt, it will be trying, but you will learn so much about yourself. Whether or not you choose to reunite with your biological family, the process of processing it will grow you and mold you in ways you never realized you could. Take heart, dear adoptee. You are not alone.
If you think you know what a bear hug feels like, you don’t. All the time I had spent wondering if we were supposed to shake hands or just go in for the hug became pointless as soon as she walked through the door. Instead of thought, something very close to instinct took over. I clutched onto her like she would disappear if I let go.